Cutting Off One's Nose

Madison, WI - There are times as a business consultant that I come across something so outrageous, that I almost have to pinch myself to ensure that I am lucid. Such was the case at the annual Brat Fest today.

Every year I usually do a 30 or 40 mile bicycle ride down to Willow Island, park my Trek and reward myself with some tasty dinner at the festival. This year I pulled into the access road and followed the signs to the bike parking, as I have in past years. But, this year was different. There was a guy with a "security" shirt on who flagged me to stop. I complied with a puzzled look on my face. He strolled over to me and said, "If you want to come in, you'll have to pour out the contents of that water bottle on your bike." Wanting to make sure my 55-year-old ears were hearing right I said, "What?"

He said, "There are no carry-ins allowed. I also need to ask you what's in that pack on the back of the bike."

I could feel my blood starting to boil as I said, "There are 10 pounds of contraband bratwurst in the saddlebag that I plan on smuggling in."

By the blank stare I assumed he didn't find the humor in my retort. Why is it when you give someone a shirt that says "security" on the back, it immediately brings out the "mall cop" in them?

It's something I noticed when I promoted concerts way back in the day. We would always warn the security folks that the audience was the customer, not someone to bully or manhandle. Even with that warning the cop-wannabes just can help themselves.

I turned on my heels, said "screw it," and rolled on to the "alternative Brat Fest" up on Capitol Square where I was greeted with open arms and not subject to search and seizure.

The reason there was an alternative in the first place was a group of folks didn't want to support Johnsville because they donated heavily to Scott Walker's campaign, as did some of the organizers of the event. Brat Fest does a lot of good by donating lots of money to scores of local groups, so it's a tough call on what to do on that level.

On a policy that makes people on bikes empty water bottles and have bike packs searched for fear of people smuggling in food, that I can't forgive.

I would have spent a fair amount of money there and drank my bike water later. They didn't get a penny from me and probably never will now. It's a case of them cutting off their nose, to spite their face.